Two Types of Silence

So I wrote this... tell me what you think please.


There are two types of silence. One that is welcoming, a still time to meditate and reflect, where I can dream my worries away. The other seeps into my soul as I walk. Tense, foreboding, anticipating something to come; it is too silent.
This second silence added with the wrong place and the wrong time became the scariest, most beautiful moment of my life.
It wasn’t a bad place; in fact, it was my favorite place in the world. But it was slowly dying, as it did every year. Shades of tan crunched under my feet as I walked, hugging my navy blue sweater closer to me. On the horizon, I could see the storm brooding like a spoiled child denied of his prize, throwing down lighting and crying uncontrollable tears. The wind howled, pulling and twisting my hair, demanding me to leave, but I just couldn’t.
I didn’t know where else to go.
Heartache was eating my insides like a ravenous tiger to flesh - tearing and shredding me to ribbons from the inside out. To stay composed had taken all my energy, and now, here, face to face with a storm so violent it sent chills up my spine, I cried. Tears for him who left me, had left everyone. Tears that stung as they rolled down my face in hurt and frustration. Tears that had boiled under my eyes for so long, I thought they would never stop. My body finally gave out, crumpling into the grasses that not long ago had helped create my most wonderful memories. Now they were dying. Everything was dying.
Sing me anything. His voice was gentle and soft in my ears as I involuntarily recalled the memories that had etched themselves into my subconscious. That particular one had happened not long ago, standing in the river, his hands holding my face as the water swirled around our legs, threatening to take us with it. The sun scorched our skin like watchful eyes. And there he stood, asking me to sing to him with that pleading look in his china blue eyes. Our bodies were mostly soaked as beads of water clung to out skin like low-powered magnets. The emotions that took over when I was around him were such an addiction, just like him. The steady beating of his heart as my head lay on his chest in our meadow sent my heart racing and my blood was molten fire pulsing through it. Golden rays of sunshine made everything vibrant, bringing shimmer into whatever it graced with its touch. That didn’t exclude him. The wind would sing us lullabies through the grass as we soaked up the sunshine, on those glorious summer morning when the world seemed far away. Warmth spread through our entire beings but what I loved most was when it caressed my eyelids. We hardly talked; we didn’t need to.
Anything the wind sighed a new, dramatic song as the purple clouds crowded around me. One instant the drops entered my clothing, kissing my skin and the net it abused me, soaking every inch. Shivering in spite of myself, I sat collapsed on the ground, watching the show around me. Tears mixed with rain; there was no differentiating. Thunder boomed around me, questioning my crying.
The splintered pieces of my raw, bleeding heart jabbed me as I breathed. Questions raced through my mind, my pulse constantly reminding me that I was still alive, still here, and he wasn’t. The crack of lightning brought focus to my eyes. The sky was an angry black, boiling and rolling across the sky, sending fierce winds that whipped rain until it felt like shattered glass pushed into my skin. Lightning shot through the clouds with veins of shocking white. Then it hit, again and again, all around me. The field seemed to be smoking as a hazy lavender mist rose. It was the scariest sensation, knowing I was the only tall thing in this meadow of dead grass in the middle of a thunderstorm.
And it was breathtaking.
The shear power and magnificence testified of something so much greater than me. My eyes closed un willingly and I breathed deep, trying to hold back tears. He wasn’t, couldn’t be, completely gone; there had to be something more. All of this wonder could not just be.
With one last look into the retreating rain, I took off running towards my truck.